team supreme

 

When everyone else has turned their back at you, who else have you got?

1. God

I am no saint nor another mother theresa. I am not religous. I am a sinner and no angel. I have wronged a number of people and ultimately wronged my self. 

For quite some time now I am contemplating of what has become of me that brought me where I am now. And if that would be enough to define who i am truly. But when i come to reflect more, i only end up with the words of repentance and changing my ways. It would be indeed a struggle for me and a difficulty for others to just accept and believe, but i must try to prove them all my worth and embrace my humanity as another prodigal son from this day forward. It’s always worth a try.

2. family

Blood has always been and will always be thicker than water. I tried so hard to cast them away my dark shadows but the blood urge has left me raise my hands up and surrender to their arms wide open. I can be whoever I want to be but for them it’ll just be the same old me, an integral part of the family.

3. true friends aka goma

I remember reading from Batenggero’s blog entitled Plastik o Goma? San ka?, how it has enlightened me of the people I consider friends. I am in no position to name names of who’s plastik and who’s goma considering the fact I have my fair share of stints as a plastik friend and goma friend to a variety of people plaguing my garden of eden. But I am very much thankful for my goma friends, although I am untidy and unworthy, they stick by me like rubber glue.

4. one self

At the end of the day, all you’ve got is your self to worry, love, respect and preserve. It is not being selfish as long as there are no compromises and sacrifices leading you towards the dark side.

For the longest time I thought I knew my self but then again, it’s never too late to surprise oneself.  I came across a stranger running my own persona, the devil in me. I never thought I had it in me, but I guessed wrong, I am capable of causing others pain because of revenge and retaliation and ofcourse my own wrong judgments. I was no victim of circumstance but a victim of my own trust over the wrong people and too much love of oneself. And who else helped me realize all these and accept and love me still after everything, the above-mentioned super people in my life. I must help my self to stand up after stumbling from a tragic fall.

I am thankful but more afraid than ever when I know for a fact I am a weakling and would stumble again with great probability. How else will I be assured that I am walking forward after a 360 degrees turnabout? Who else but faith, blood, goma friends and one self!

prodigal son

As I have told a million times before I am a non-traditional practicing Roman Catholic. Having been brought up in a Christian school under Protestant religion, I am just very much versed with all the parables in the Bible, and it ends there. I never really thought I will relive those stories but here I am now, the prodigal son reborn in the year 2009.

April 2, 2008, I left both proud and decided. Although I confused the circumstances that occurred with great relief, i was in pain. I cannot say I regret all those but I believe everything that happened were bound to happen. I enjoyed every moment I was away but cherished every moment I left behind. I tried to justify my exit because of our differences and of course my need of growth and the call of a promising life I absolutely thought I needed if and only we parted ways. 

I never really thought I would return to him but I had to, it is the right thing to do. I never really thought he would accept me but he did, with open arms. With just one text message away, he gave me words of wisdom and I felt home again. I cannot say I love the idea of the reason of my return because it is just too much to bear. But it must be fate that brought me back to him. He is still the same old second father I look up to. God indeed has His own ways, plans far marvelous than my own.

I am again part of The Law Firm of Cenon L. Casihan, Jr. beginning March 9, 2009.