at the end of the day, everything is a test.

These words have kept haunting my thoughts for quite some time now. I cannot say I’m bothered by this fact but thinking otherwise is neither a pleasing thought either.
Here goes… I met someone.

He is nice, smart, hardworking, good-looking and funny. He never ceases to makes me smile since that first day I met him. The mere thought of him makes my shoulders shiver. I never did consider him to be someone I would admire and who would inspire me. But I guess destiny had better plans for us to be more acquainted with each other.

With the twists of fate making my world a roller-coaster ride, he had taken the control and left me not gasping for air but rather enjoy the ride with a nice warmth of a familiar hug holding me.

Seeing him everyday makes me feel that everything will be alright despite whatever happens. I need not be worried nor sad with all the awful circumstances that has been thrown at my feet. He makes me feel happy inside and out.

But then after quite some time that warm smile and hug vanished from thin air. He now even refuses to look at me with those sparkling eyes. All I get are those cold nods you can get from politicians and strangers who happen to block your path somehow. And I’m more disturbed with the fact that as far as I know I have not done anything wrong. Hard as it was for everyone else, I tried to understand him and give him his space… thinking deep inside that things will soon be back to how it used to be. And I hate my self for somehow blaming my self for not being angry at him for punishing not only me but the rest of us who counts a lot from him.

I am torn with the fact that I owe him and in truth and in fact I have learned to love him. That kind of love I often feel for someone I truly care about wholeheartedly and unconditionally but not really affectionately and romantically or has my senses completely fooled me that I have confused my self intentionally that all these feelings mean only one thing.

The mystery covering his personality has tripled to almost infinity which leaves me with a puzzled look I never would have discovered I can come up with everytime I see him. Then I thought of great wonder of my yester years when things were simple and I was happy, when I wanted to grow up suddenly and that things to change eventually. I wished for things I want rather than what I need. Then the right words flooded my thoughts… that in this life, at the end of the day, everything is a test.

Whatever lies ahead of us remains a mystery which will unfold at the right time. I will have to wait till then and hope far greater things I thought will forever be a dream. He might not be the answer to my prayers but he would forever remain to be someone who had touched my hands and has left me smiling ever since.